Funny SMS

THIS IS INCREDIBLE... Read all the Numbers...
Slowly and in Order!!
Be Careful not to MISS ANY
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30

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TOMORROW I WILL SEND YOU
THE ABC's

Buying a Monkey

Man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a monkey.
The shop owner pointed out three identical monkeys and said, "The monkey to the left costs 500 dollars."
Why does that monkey cost so much?" the man wondered.
The owner replied, "Well, it knows how to use a computer."
The man asked about the next monkey on the perch.
"That one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the other monkey can do, plus it knows how to use the LINUX operating system."
Naturally, the startled customer asked about the third monkey.
"That one costs 2,000 dollars."
"And what does that one do?" the man asked.
The owner replied, " To be honest, I've never seen him doing anything, but the other two call him BOSS!

Marriage Joke

Wife: You always carry my photo in your briefcase to the office. Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"

Tech Questions

A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was “running it under Windows.” The woman responded, “No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine.”

Tech Support: “How much free space do you have on your hard drive?”
Customer: “Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?”

Overheard in a computer shop: Customer: “I’d like a mouse mat, please.”
Salesperson: “Certainly sir, we’ve got a large variety.”
Customer: “But will they be compatible with my computer?”

Customer: “Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?”
Customer: “So that’ll get me connected to the Internet, right?”
Tech Support: “Yeah.”
Customer: “And that’s the latest version of the Internet, right?”
Tech Support: “Uhh…uh…uh…yeah.”

Customer: “My computer crashed!”
Tech Support: “It crashed?”
Customer: “Yeah, it won’t let me play my game.”
Tech Support: “Alright, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot.”
Customer: “No, it didn’t crash — it crashed.”
Tech Support: “Huh?”
Customer: “I crashed my game. That’s what I said before. Now it doesn’t work.”
Turned out, the user was playing Lunar Lander and crashed his spaceship.
Tech Support: “Click on ‘File,’ then ‘New Game.’”
Customer: [pause] “Wow! How’d you learn how to do that?”