17 October, 2006

Math Problem


08 October, 2006

A middle-age man’s story…

Well, it's not a midlife crisis, but here's how things worked out for me. Married 39 years, took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 39years ago, we had a cheap apartment, a cheap car, slept on a sofa bedand watched a 10 inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 19 year old brunette.

Now, we have a nice house, nice car, big bed and plasma screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 58 year old woman. It seems to me that you are notholding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman.
She told me to go out and find a hot 25 year old blond, and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment, driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed...

01 October, 2006


A woman was leaving a convenience store with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral
procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black
hearse about 50 feet behind the first one.

Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit bull on a leash. Behind her, a short distance
back, were about 200 women walking single file. The woman couldn't stand her curiosity. She respectfully
approached the woman walking the dog and said, "I am so sorry for your loss", I know now it is a bad time
to disturb you, but I have never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?"

"My husband's."

"What happened to him?"

The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him."

She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

The woman answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my husband when the dog turned on her."

A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed between the two women.

"Can I borrow the dog?"

"Get in line."