27 May, 2009

The Execution

Three women are about to be executed. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead and one’s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!" Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes. The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!" Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes. By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" and the blonde yells, "FIRE!!!"

06 May, 2009

1000$ Contest

There was a blonde who was at an all blonde football game. At halftime she was called down to answer questions to see if she could win $1000. The first question was "what is 10 plus 11?" She hesitates and says, hm... 5! The host says: "no I'm sorry, that's incorrect." All of the blondes in the stadium chanted: “Give her another chance, give her another chance!” So the host agrees and said: “ok how about 5 plus 5?” She answers and says 20. Again all the blondes chanted give her another chance, give her another chance. So the host agrees again and says, ok last chance, what is 2 plus 2. The blonde says 4! and the audience says: "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"