WHAT MEN WOULD LIKE TO SAY TO WOMEN

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Sometimes we're not thinking about you. Live with it. Anything you wear is fine. Really. Crying is blackmail. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are? You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done - not both. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.